Anxiety doesn't mean you aren't meant for this life.

Some years back, I was having lunch with a friend. I had just come from an audition.

I was still buzzing with that post-adrenaline high. Actually, it was a silly audition: one of those where they ask you to ‘look confident while pretending to type on a computer’ type of auditions. 🤔

I nailed it. 😂

So here we were at this lunch, catching up, and somehow we got onto the topic of performance anxiety. 

But we weren’t talking about me.  (I’d learned to hide it well.)

We were actually talking about someone else who’d been struggling with it.

And then he said something that lodged itself in my body like a pebble in a shoe:

“Well… maybe someone who deals with severe performance anxiety just shouldn’t perform. Why would they want to?”

He wasn’t being cruel. He is a friend I adore- smart, thoughtful, absolutely well-meaning.

He genuinely meant it as a practical observation. 

But it bothered me. It stuck. Not because he was wrong about fear…it really can make the simplest things feel impossible. 

Because he was wrong about what fear means.

If you’ve ever dealt with performance anxiety, you know this already:

Fear doesn’t show up in your life because you’re not meant for something. 

It shows up because the thing means something to you.

For so many of us, singing is a place where we feel most like ourselves.

So today, I want to offer a little reframing. A little permission. And a little love.

Performance anxiety doesn’t mean you’re not meant to sing.

It doesn’t mean you’re not good enough.

It doesn’t mean you’re weak, or unprofessional, or lacking discipline.

It means you’re human.

It means your body is trying…awkwardly, clumsily…to protect you from something it thinks is dangerous:

Being fully seen.

And honestly? Being seen is vulnerable.

Being heard is intimate.

Being witnessed in your creative truth is one of the most courageous things a person can do.

So if your hands sweat, your voice shakes, your stomach flips, and somehow you still show up and sing? You are a walking act of courage. 

You’re anxious because you care.

Because you want to do well.

Because this art form isn’t just a task- it’s a piece of your heart.

Singers with anxiety aren’t fragile.

They’re not “unsuited” for this life.

They’re in the trenches doing some of the bravest emotional work anyone can do.

Here is what I know:

• You don’t need another pep talk that evaporates the moment you walk onstage.

• You don’t need someone telling you to “just relax.”

👉🏻 What you do need are tools.

Tools to manage that fear.

Tools that give you a sense of ownership over your voice and your art.

A “This is who I am, and this is my voice” kind of vibe.

How do you get that?

This is something that I created from my years of struggle and desire to feel free-er and more confident. 

In my Own It Workshop, this is the work we do- making the shift from seeking approval to stepping into ownership.

When you start practicing ownership:

You show up differently.
You don’t wait to be chosen.
You stop trying to fit into a mold you were never meant to fit.

There’s a freedom in that- a boldness, a calm confidence that comes from the inside out.

And yes, you may still feel nerves.

You may still feel doubt. (That’s NORMAL)

You may still have the occasional “Why am I doing this?” moment five minutes before a performance. 😉

But your center holds.

I created this workshop (wait...did I mention it's free!?) because singers need tools, they need strategies they can rely on. 

They need a way to meet their nervous system with compassion instead of shame.

If this newsletter resonates with you- if you read any part of this and whispered “ohhhhh, that’s me”- then I want you to know something:

Your fear isn’t a sign to stop.

It’s a sign to go deeper.

Your voice matters.

And you deserve to feel proud, supported, and fully in your power as a singer.

If you’re ready to shift from seeking approval to stepping into ownership, if you’re craving the kind of confidence that comes from the inside out, grab your seat to my FREE Own It! Workshop. Running for a limited time!