The Inner Critic

 

I don’t know about you, but my inner critic can be A LOT.

 

 

Just the other day as I was writing my outline for the 4th episode of The Joyful Singer Podcast, I found myself getting stuck. 

 

 

I realized- she was nitpicking.

 

She wasn’t exactly being kind.

 

 

(And trust me the irony is NOT lost on me that the topic for this week’s episode is The Inner Critic.)

 

 

I took a break, went outside and got some fresh air.

 

 

She and I have an understanding now. When the voice gets loud, we take a break. Regroup.

 

 

Maybe you know this voice too?

 

 

The one that replays your performance and only hears the mistakes.

 

 

The one that wakes you up at 3am to revisit something you said.

 

The one that tells you you’re not ready, not good enough, not quite there yet.

 

 

Yep! That voice.

 

 

Here’s the problem:

 

 

This inner voice doesn’t just comment on your singing.

 

 

It shapes your entire experience of it.

 

 

It’s the reason singing stops being fun.

 

It’s the reason you hold back… the reason you don’t even start.

 

 

And the tricky part?

 

 

It sounds convincing!!

 

 

It tells you:

 

“I’m helping you improve.”

 

“You need me to get better.”

 

 

But what if that’s not actually true?

 

 

From an evolutionary standpoint, the inner critic was designed to keep you from:

 

 

-being rejected

-taking risks

-stepping outside the tribe

 

 

But now?

 

 

It reacts to things like:

 

 

-singing in front of people

-posting a video

-trying something new

 

As if they’re threats.

 

 

So it gets louder, more intense.

 

 

More convincing.

 

 

But it’s not wise.

 

 

And it’s definitely not the best inner voice to take advice from.

 

 

Most of us were trained to improve through judgment. 

 

 

And yes… that can work.

 

 

But it comes at a cost. (You know… like feeling stressed… disconnected….. anxious, grumpy, all that)

 

There’s another way to grow, to get what you want, to reach your goals, to have success, and it’s NOT from beating yourself up.

 

 

It’s by tuning into a quieter, wiser part of yourself that uses love, encouragement, passion, purpose, joy… all the good stuff to pull you into action…. not push you.

 

 

When you notice the inner critic, super negative voice, gently interrupt it with:

 

 

→ “What’s right?”

 

 

What’s right about:

 

 

How I just sang?

 

This moment?

 

This version of me?

 

This person right in front of me?

 

 

This doesn’t mean ignoring growth.

 

 

It means changing the energy you grow from.

 

 

And in order to dial down that inner critic, you don’t fight her.

 

You create space around her.

 

 

Start small:

 

 

Take 10 seconds → slow inhale, slow exhale

 

Take 2 minutes → close your eyes, body scan

 

Take 10 minutes → step outside, feel the air, notice something real. right in front of you

 

 

These are resets.

 

 

 

A return to the part of you that is calm, clear, kind & wise.

 

 

Trust me, you don’t need your inner critic to improve.

 

 

You can grow from encouragement! From curiosity, from creativity & joy.

 

 

And not only is it more effective…

 

 

It actually makes singing feel like something you want to do.

 

 

If your inner critic is running the show…

 

You will hold back, play small, second guess yourself, lose the joy in singing.

 

 

And that’s the real loss!

 

 

This week, try this:

 

 

Take a few moments each day to pause.

 

Do a check in. Connect back to your body. Get out of your head. Create space around THE voice.

 

 

And gently ask yourself:

 

 

“What’s right?”

 

 

If this resonated with you, I go much deeper into this in Episode 4 of The Joyful Singer Podcast.

 

 

We explore why we have this voice, its function, how we can work WITH this voice, lower its volume and learn how to tune into another one that can get us where we want to go MORE effectively, more efficiently AND more joyfully.

 

 

You can listen HERE.

 

 

Let me know what you think, how you are doing, what you are up to, what you are working on… anything you feel like sharing! I’m all ears!